Lists

10 Things I Want In The Elder Scrolls Online

Within hours of Game Informer’s announcement  that The Elder Scrolls Online would be the feature story for their upcoming June edition, scans of the entire article had been leaked, and with it came information that enraged some and excited others

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10 Things I Want In The Elder Scrolls Online

Within hours of Game Informer’s announcement  that The Elder Scrolls Online would be the feature story for their upcoming June edition, scans of the entire article had been leaked, and with it came information that enraged some and excited others

/ 3 Comments

10 things we want from WayForward's Adventure Time game

Through a series of elaborate tweets from Adventure Time creator Pendleton Ward and WayForward Technologies an Adventure Time game was announced. Before the announcement Ward had a habit of posting doodles of potential game ideas, but nothing concrete. Right now

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10 things we want from WayForward's Adventure Time game

Through a series of elaborate tweets from Adventure Time creator Pendleton Ward and WayForward Technologies an Adventure Time game was announced. Before the announcement Ward had a habit of posting doodles of potential game ideas, but nothing concrete. Right now

/ One Comment

The 5 worst things from Mass Effect 2

Mass Effect 2 did not deserve the highly positive response it received. The game is flawed at every level. Sadly, our love of its predecessor has blinded us to the ME2’s many problems. This post examines the five worst elements.

This is the final part of my four part series on the flaws of Mass Effect 2. The first post in the series was about the awful characters. The second examined the hellishly bad decisions in the game’s design. Part three enumerated 20 instances of terrible writing in Mass Effect 2.

These are the 5 worst things from Mass Effect 2.

5: All geth are good geth.

I would like to bring to your attention the codex entry for the geth from Mass Effect 1. Please note the last line:

“It should be stressed, however, that in all forms the geth are universally violent creatures.”

Let’s talk about why suddenly making the geth mostly good-guys in order to teach us a hackneyed lesson about sapience was a terrible idea.

/ 16 Comments

The 5 worst things from Mass Effect 2

Mass Effect 2 did not deserve the highly positive response it received. The game is flawed at every level. Sadly, our love of its predecessor has blinded us to the ME2’s many problems. This post examines the five worst elements.

This is the final part of my four part series on the flaws of Mass Effect 2. The first post in the series was about the awful characters. The second examined the hellishly bad decisions in the game’s design. Part three enumerated 20 instances of terrible writing in Mass Effect 2.

These are the 5 worst things from Mass Effect 2.

5: All geth are good geth.

I would like to bring to your attention the codex entry for the geth from Mass Effect 1. Please note the last line:

“It should be stressed, however, that in all forms the geth are universally violent creatures.”

Let’s talk about why suddenly making the geth mostly good-guys in order to teach us a hackneyed lesson about sapience was a terrible idea.

/ 16 Comments

20 terrible things from Mass Effect 2: the flawed writing

No matter how many 100s Mass Effect 2 received from the gaming press, it was a deeply flawed game. This post examines the abominable writing.

To prepare for the release of the demo for Mass Effect 3, I’m revisiting Mass Effect 2 in a four part series. Let’s examine 20 instances of the terrible writing in Mass Effect 2. The series will then conclude with the five worst elements of the game.

20: Don’t invent a lame excuse to take away all my stuff.

I think the only reason they killed you in the beginning was so they’d have an excuse not to transfer over your items. Being killed off and coming back to life doesn’t seem to have had any real impact past the first 30 minutes of the story. You don’t struggle with the existential crisis that should come with having been dead for two years and come back. You don’t spend more than perhaps a line or two on thoughts about the afterlife.

You were dead, then you “got better.” This should be a major plot point, in Shepard’s character arc in ME2. At the very least, there should have been more questions about the process.

Instead Shepard walks through the game like an unthinking automaton, stumbling around the edge of this enormous plot hole. They missed an amazing storytelling opportunity.

Shepard’s death in ME2 also negates anything you might have accomplished with multiple play-throughs on the same character in the first game.

As a result, Shepard’s death and unexplained recovery seem only to be an excuse to take away your stuff.

I liked my stuff.

/ 45 Comments

20 terrible things from Mass Effect 2: the flawed writing

No matter how many 100s Mass Effect 2 received from the gaming press, it was a deeply flawed game. This post examines the abominable writing.

To prepare for the release of the demo for Mass Effect 3, I’m revisiting Mass Effect 2 in a four part series. Let’s examine 20 instances of the terrible writing in Mass Effect 2. The series will then conclude with the five worst elements of the game.

20: Don’t invent a lame excuse to take away all my stuff.

I think the only reason they killed you in the beginning was so they’d have an excuse not to transfer over your items. Being killed off and coming back to life doesn’t seem to have had any real impact past the first 30 minutes of the story. You don’t struggle with the existential crisis that should come with having been dead for two years and come back. You don’t spend more than perhaps a line or two on thoughts about the afterlife.

You were dead, then you “got better.” This should be a major plot point, in Shepard’s character arc in ME2. At the very least, there should have been more questions about the process.

Instead Shepard walks through the game like an unthinking automaton, stumbling around the edge of this enormous plot hole. They missed an amazing storytelling opportunity.

Shepard’s death in ME2 also negates anything you might have accomplished with multiple play-throughs on the same character in the first game.

As a result, Shepard’s death and unexplained recovery seem only to be an excuse to take away your stuff.

I liked my stuff.

/ 45 Comments

10 terrible things from Mass Effect 2: game design hell

What makes a game good? It has to have the whole package. Sadly, Mass Effect 2 lacks in every category and the game’s design is no exception.

With Mass Effect 3’s demo coming out in less than a week, I’m revisiting Mass Effect 2 in a four part series. This second post takes a look at some of the awful choices made in the construction of the game and its mechanics. We’ll follow up with a post examining the writing and concluding with the five worst elements of Mass Effect 2.

10: Waking up in a room and fighting a bunch of robots.

So, you wake up in a room with no memory beyond the brief interactive cut-scene that failed to explain how you survived falling from orbit. Then you get the standard new game walk-through, which involves fighting a bunch of personality-free robots that have, unsurprisingly, gone rogue.

Why is there absolutely no value in the beginning of the game?

/ 17 Comments

10 terrible things from Mass Effect 2: game design hell

What makes a game good? It has to have the whole package. Sadly, Mass Effect 2 lacks in every category and the game’s design is no exception.

With Mass Effect 3’s demo coming out in less than a week, I’m revisiting Mass Effect 2 in a four part series. This second post takes a look at some of the awful choices made in the construction of the game and its mechanics. We’ll follow up with a post examining the writing and concluding with the five worst elements of Mass Effect 2.

10: Waking up in a room and fighting a bunch of robots.

So, you wake up in a room with no memory beyond the brief interactive cut-scene that failed to explain how you survived falling from orbit. Then you get the standard new game walk-through, which involves fighting a bunch of personality-free robots that have, unsurprisingly, gone rogue.

Why is there absolutely no value in the beginning of the game?

/ 17 Comments

10 terrible things from Mass Effect 2: the awful characters

It would be fair to say that Mass Effect 2 received universal acclaim from critics when it was released. It didn’t deserve it. Whatever the reason, the game journalism community gave ME2 a critical pass.

With Mass Effect 3’s demo coming out in less than a week, I’m revisiting Mass Effect 2 in a four part series. This first post will look at some significant flaws with characters in the game.

10: Mordin the geeksploitation.

Mordin’s character is the geek on the team. While the rest of your team have superpowers or are action stars, Mordin’s the guy who spends the time he isn’t in your squad sitting around doing research in the lab. Mordin, “the professor,” is a stand-in for the average video-game-playing audience, or at least the type of person who’s expected to like the RPG-stylings of the original Mass Effect.

How is he characterized then?

/ 35 Comments

10 terrible things from Mass Effect 2: the awful characters

It would be fair to say that Mass Effect 2 received universal acclaim from critics when it was released. It didn’t deserve it. Whatever the reason, the game journalism community gave ME2 a critical pass.

With Mass Effect 3’s demo coming out in less than a week, I’m revisiting Mass Effect 2 in a four part series. This first post will look at some significant flaws with characters in the game.

10: Mordin the geeksploitation.

Mordin’s character is the geek on the team. While the rest of your team have superpowers or are action stars, Mordin’s the guy who spends the time he isn’t in your squad sitting around doing research in the lab. Mordin, “the professor,” is a stand-in for the average video-game-playing audience, or at least the type of person who’s expected to like the RPG-stylings of the original Mass Effect.

How is he characterized then?

/ 35 Comments

October Omnitopic Roundup: DLC

Hello friends! Another month concluded, this month with a massive snowstorm that wiped out a week of Western Massachusetts time and left me sitting cold and alone in my room, pondering my fate as a human being. Would I freeze

/ One Comment

October Omnitopic Roundup: DLC

Hello friends! Another month concluded, this month with a massive snowstorm that wiped out a week of Western Massachusetts time and left me sitting cold and alone in my room, pondering my fate as a human being. Would I freeze

/ One Comment

10 tips and tricks to become a better Gears of War 3 player

To celebrate my recent, and most likely temporary, inauguration into the top 100 ranked King of the Hill in Gears of War 3, I thought I’d share some tips on how to become a better Gears player. I note that

/ 10 Comments

10 tips and tricks to become a better Gears of War 3 player

To celebrate my recent, and most likely temporary, inauguration into the top 100 ranked King of the Hill in Gears of War 3, I thought I’d share some tips on how to become a better Gears player. I note that

/ 10 Comments

Four Nintendo Franchises in Need of Revival

Possibly the saddest thing modern day Nintendo has done is that they’ve pared down the number of their franchises they’re doing anything with. We’ve seen more Mario games than we can imagine, and we’ve seen some oldies revised into modern

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Four Nintendo Franchises in Need of Revival

Possibly the saddest thing modern day Nintendo has done is that they’ve pared down the number of their franchises they’re doing anything with. We’ve seen more Mario games than we can imagine, and we’ve seen some oldies revised into modern

/ 5 Comments

Six Things We'd Love to See in Borderlands 2

I loved Borderlands like the son I’ve never had. Well, I tried to love it. Unfortunately, like my hypothetical son, Borderlands had some major problems: it wet the bed every other week, it couldn’t eat cereal without throwing the bowl

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Six Things We'd Love to See in Borderlands 2

I loved Borderlands like the son I’ve never had. Well, I tried to love it. Unfortunately, like my hypothetical son, Borderlands had some major problems: it wet the bed every other week, it couldn’t eat cereal without throwing the bowl

/ Comments Off on Six Things We'd Love to See in Borderlands 2